Sometimes it only takes a moment to actually have clarity on the next path you need to take. For me, one of those moments happened 3 years ago when I decided I needed more.
I'd be lying if I told you I hadn't thought about moving back to Washington a million other times when I lived in NYC, but I had too many reasons to stay and the truth was I felt guilty for wanting more. Life was good... life was comfortable... I was legit living out the life I had dreamed of a few years earlier... so who was I to still want more?
Sometimes life just hits you though, and on that day I got the (very unexpected) clarity I needed confirming I needed to make a change. For me, the catalyst was a breakup and a cross country move, but maybe for you, it's the decision to make a big career move, deciding to move to that city you’ve always loved, or maybe it's taking that first step to chase that dream you've been putting on the backburner.
Whatever it may be I want you to hear me loud and clear. Don't ever settle or feel bad for wanting more in your life. EVER! We each have so many chapters in our lives and it's important to remember that things don't have to be dire to make a change. Sometimes you just realize the path you're on isn't the path you need to be on to get to where you're going. And honestly, sometimes making those decisions can be harder -- because things DON'T totally suck. So if this post is resonating with you and maybe you’re in a situation where you’re not sure what you should do next I want you to think about your answers to these questions:
Where does your mind wander when you let it wander?
Do you have reoccurring daydreams? Are there any patterns? Are your daydreams actually something you’d want to pursue if other life constraints weren’t involved?
Would your life be better or worse if you made this change?
Here’s where the pros and cons come into place. Try and focus on realistic outcomes if you were to make a change and think about the big picture.
What is holding you back from making this change? Is it circumstantial, someone in your life, location, etc.?
Is there a chance your circumstances could change making this change an option or is that a no-go? Are there any changes you could make to your circumstances to make it an option?
If you don’t follow this dream or make this change, will you regret it?
Regret can be a loaded emotion but I want you to really think about how you’ll feel if you don’t pursue what you’re considering. Is it something you will be sad about at first but be ok with not pursuing or will it be something you’ll always look back on and wish you did?
What would make you happier in the long run, your current situation or making this change?
This question is a big one. Really dive in and think about how you would feel if you were to make this change even with all circumstances considered. Would you be happier in the long run?
Blowing up your comfortable life can be scary and lead to periods of uncomfortable growth — you can bet there will be a bunch of ugly cry sessions. But trust me when I say, the regret of not making changes that you feel in your gut you should, will hurt a lot more in the long run. No matter what you decide just remember that you CAN make big changes and go after the life you’re dreaming of. You just have to have the courage to make the jump.
