Let's get this out of the way... starting over is scary! Change isn't easy and the idea of starting over or trying something new is one of the biggest fears that holds people back in their lives. We like being comfortable and there is nothing comfortable about blowing up your life. It's hard. And the process doesn't stop being tough after the decision process.

Something I've been working on a lot over the last 6 months is being more transparent and authentic in both my business and personal life. It's definitely not something that comes easily -- it's muchhh easier to share and write about the lighter things in life. I think there is a lot of value in getting real about our stories though and if my experiences can inspire or help others then it will make putting myself out there totally worth it! So today I'm staying true to that commitment and digging into some of the things that have helped me in my personal journey of starting over.

Embracing Help & Support from Friends and Family

Confession, while I LOVE my family and am so thankful for them -- they are the main reason why I decided to move home after all -- I've struggled a lot with moving in with my parents. I totally understand this is overly dramatic, but the idea of moving in with my parents truly felt like the end of the world. I never moved home after college and I was really proud of that. So the idea of moving in with my mom after being on my own for a decade had me like.. 😱😱😱. But guess what? It wasn't the end of the world, and it's a decision I'm really happy I made. Sure, I could have found another apartment right away, but 1.) between making decisions and sorting out this cross-country move, my head and bank account were ready to explode and 2.) after such a BIG change I think internally I knew I really needed to get back to my roots and be really close to my support system.

That being said, if you are lucky enough to have family or friends you can stay with for a bit while you sort out some of the other details, put your pride aside and embrace it. Even if you aren't physically moving in with them, take them up on whatever support they're offering. Regular girls nights, weekly calls, whatever it may be, take them up on it. They want the best for you and being around your support system will really help during this time. I know if I had my own place right away it would have been so easy for me to embrace being a homebody for a while and hide behind my work, but being at home hasn't allowed me to do that. Instead, I've been forced to get out and about and keep my schedule busy, which has been much more beneficial than if I had distanced myself from others at this time.

Switch up your Routine

This has been a BIG one for me! I credit switching up my routine with being one of the things that has helped me the most. Obviously you can't change everyyything, but I definitely recommend switching up what you can. My mom lives 5 mins away from a local hike, and something that I've really enjoyed is adding hiking to my routine 3 days a week. I mentioned it in an earlier post, but there is also something very therapeutic about getting your butt kicked while climbing to the top of a mountain. Plus, it's something I couldn't do in the city, so it has been a nice change and given me some dedicated alone time.

Now that I'm on the west coast, my work schedule has shifted as well. I'm not sure that one is for the better 😜. Because my business partner is on the east coast, as with a lot of our clients I decided to adopt an east coast work schedule as well. I wonder if that was a good decision every time my alarm goes off in the dark at 5:30 a.m., but I'm making it work. The good thing about this schedule is it has freed up my afternoons. When I lived in NYC, I got really bad about working all day.. taking a little break.. and then working some more at night. Since moving back though, I've been working really hard at unplugging at night to actually give myself a little break and time to enjoy life a little.

Not only have both of these changes been good for my health and well-being, but it's been helpful in feeling like this new chapter, really is a new chapter. If you're going to make some big changes, might as well go all in right?!

Say Yes to Exploring & Trying New Things

Since I moved, I feel like my social calendar has exploded. Which sounds funny since, hiii I used to live in NYC, and my schedule explodes after moving back to a small town? Ha, I know, I know. Part of it is I've just been really excited to try new things that I wasn't able to do in New York and the other is I've just been saying yes to all of the things. 

I've always liked a good adventure, but at the same time, I'm also someone who appreciates having some downtime. I'm sure things will settle down in a few months, but for the time being I've put that homebody trait on the shelf. Like, I legit haven't had a free weekend since June.. which has been both thrilling and exhausting at the same time. I will say though, keeping busy and trying new things have been KEY in this process so I absolutely encourage you do the same if you have the opportunity. Get out there and try a new restaurant, reconnect with friends, and check out new spots you haven't been before. I mean guys, I went to a Renaissance Fair this summer... it doesn't get much more different than NYC than that 😂.

Get Your Goals Straight & Write Them Down

When you're starting over there is SO much to process. While your "big picture" goals may be at top of mind, chances are you've been so busy dealing with the logistics of blowing your life up, that sorting through some of the smaller details have slipped behind. Once you've had a chance to settle in a little it's a great time to really lay everything out. What direction do you want to head in now and how are you going to get there? I felt like I was treading water the first month or so I was back so once I had a chance to sit down and dedicate some time to my goals I felt like a brand new person. This process might not be as big of a deal to some of you, but for me I'm someone who really likes to sit down, make plans, and write everything down. Regardless of your process, take some time to check-in and get connected to the direction you want to head.

Have Patience With Yourself

And last but definitely not least... be patient with yourself. Starting over or making any big life changes.. is A LOT emotionally. You'll have days where you're so happy you made the change and then you'll have others where you'll wonder if you did the right thing. It can be a really confusing time and sometimes you'll just feel like a total mess. You'll be excited, you'll be scared, and some days you'll just cry your eyes out. 

I'm guilty of being someone who likes to brush things under the rug or just avoid thinking about things because it hurts, and something I've really tried to take on this time around is giving myself permission to feel all of those feelings. I won't sugarcoat it either, it's been hard. Something that I've really struggled with this time around too is it has been entirely self-inflicted. While moving back to Washington was always in the back of my mind, I had a good life in NYC. My life didn't suck, so processing everything that goes a long with that has been tricky. Regardless of how you're feeling though, allow yourself some time to really think about things and experience that because it will help you in the long run. If there's something I've realized in doing so, it is that it's okay to both enjoy the start of a new chapter and long for your last one at the same time. It won't always make sense, but I think being really honest with yourself about that is important. 

I hope this has been helpful to some of you or at least given you a little more insight into my ongoing journey! If you have any other tips that could be useful, feel free to share in the comments.

Wohweee, it has been a whirlwind of a trip back on the west coast! My 10-year reunion was this weekend so I decided to make a trip out of it, which has been nice! Well, except for the minor detail that I've pretty much been sick with a nasty cold the whole time.. dang you recirculated airplane air! Even so, it's always so refreshing to get out of the city and have a change of pace back home.

My reunion has been in the works for awhile now -- I may have had a slight heart attack when I got invited to the Facebook Group this Fall. To be totally honest I didn't know if I wanted to come because high school wasn't exactly my favorite chapter. After I found out one of my besties was making the trip from Idaho though, I threw all that hesitation out the window and booked a flight.

The truth is growing up can be tough, hindsight is always 20/20 once you've been through it right?! Since this weekend has been all sorts of nostalgia I thought it was the perfect time to look back and share some lessons I've learned over the years that I wish I could have told my little high school self!

Don't Spend So Much Time Trying to Fit In

You'll spend so much time trying to fit in.. but why?! Instead of trying to wear the perfect clothes, listen to the right kind of music, and like the right kind of movies, just embrace who you really are. The people you're trying so hard to have an impression on today will be a distant memory in a few years so instead focus on growing up and growing into your own skin. Your unique traits and personality will be what will help you get ahead in the future so embrace it!

Have Fun and Put Your Friendships First

The people who love your quirks and embrace you for who you really are? Love them hard. A lot of your friends from high school (and even from before) will become lifelong friends. Forgive each other after petty fights and move on. These people will be your rocks now and in years to come, even when your lives take completely different paths. Soak in as much time with them and make as many memories as you can.

Follow Your Passions

Don't let anyone talk you out of following your passions because it's not the "cool" thing to do. If there's something you love, go for it! Don't be afraid to try new things to find what those passions are too and even more important what you don't love. Trying new things out now will help guide your decisions for your future.

Enjoy the Moment

You don't have to be in such a rush to grow up. Although hey, you'll do some cool things in the future. Try and slow things down and live in the moment. Oh, and appreciate not having to pay bills because that part of growing up won't be as fun later.

Don't Be Afraid to Speak Up

You're going to deal with your fair share of... for the lack of a better word... crap. Don't be afraid to speak up for both yourself or for others. It won't always be easy but it's the right thing to do. 

You'll Get Through it Just Fine

There will be so many moments that will feel like the end of the world, but guess what you'll make it out on the other side just fine. Life will always have its ups and downs but just remember high school is only one chapter of your journey.

Even though I didn't love high school, I have to say our reunion really reminded me of all of the good that came out of those years and how far so many of us have come. I have to say I had about a 1,000 times more fun than I even thought I would too. We only had about 60 people from our 350+ class come, but I think that kind of made it even better actually because the people who really wanted to be there wanted to catch up and see everyone.

Funny enough I connected with a lot of people more this weekend than I probably even did in high school. So that was a fun and little unexpected bonus too. It's so cool how you can reconnect and find people you have a lot in common with after a few more years of living life. So here's to embracing our past, appreciating the journey along the way and reconnecting!

One of the many perks of living in New York City is having access to some really cool events. Especially career related because there are so many media and business headquarters here! If you caught my Instagram story earlier you might have caught that I went to a great event put on by XO Group called #XOGroupFoundHERS. The event series highlights women making waves in biz and the latest event featured Co-founders of BaubleBar! It was such a great evening learning about Amy Jain and Daniella Yacobovsky's story and while we work in entirely different industries, I really identified with a lot of their stories. So today I wanted to touch on some of the topics they discussed and the lessons I learned.

Making the Transition From Friends to Biz Partners

They started out by sharing how they met and started their business, and true story I texted my business partner Mallory and said, "Soooo umm basically we're like the BaubleBar girls 2.0. Like the way they describe their partnership was on point." Maybe a slightttt exaggeration but their story gave me all of those familiar vibes. 

They originally met in a professional atmosphere in investment banking and after sitting by each other ended up becoming friends and then later decided to embark on their business journey together. When asked if they were worried about going into biz together since they were friends or if they ever butt heads, they said honestly we don't really have that problem and usually end up with ideas in the same direction. Part of the reason they attribute their success as biz partners? Because they originally met in a professional environment!

While they're a few years, and a few funding rounds, ahead of us 😜, this is something I really related to because Mallory and I met in the same way. While we certainly had no idea or plans to ever start a business together back then.. Working together for 3 years did give us ample time to realize we made a badass team and worked very well together. Going into biz with friends isn't for everyone, but I think working together previously allowed us to make that transition easier. 

Some of the key things to easing into a partnership seamlessly? Making sure you're on the same page with your visions for the business. That's obviously a BIG topic but finding middle ground on what you're trying to accomplish is essential. Next up? Having honest conversations about what you really like doing and what you're not as great at. Finding someone whose strengths are your weaknesses can be so beneficial too! The term divide and conquer hits home hard when it comes to partnerships. The ladies also talked about how they still find ways to separate their friendship and their business. While business is def a HUGE part of their relationship and lives they also talked about how they are able to hang out and focus on the personal aspects of their friendship.

Don't Stress as Much Over the Small Details

They shared great advice about how people probably won't remember every newsletter you send or every web update. If you're on point most of the time people aren't going to notice. They told a hilarious story about how they used to hold hands and press the send button together when sending their newsletters out because they were so nervous. The truth is, give it your best shot and get it out there. Over time, you'll learn, you'll grow and you'll keep improving! You'll also get a better idea of what resonates with your audience so instead of being afraid, just DO it! You may look back and laugh at your designs and tactics but everything will come into place in time!

Do Consumer Research

Since they came up with the idea for BaubleBar while in business school they used that to their advantage to do market research. While market and consumer research sound like such fancy words, it doesn't have to be and they shared the scrappy techniques they applied. Whether you're doing online research about competitors, setting up focus groups, or simply posting an online survey and getting it into the hands of your target market -- the goal with any form of research is to just get some feedback before sinking dollars into that plan.

No matter what approach you decide to take on, the key is to get to know your target audience better so that you can adjust your model and products based upon their feedback. This advice is SO crucial no matter what industry you work in and I think it's something that you consistency need to pay attention to throughout your business journey. Being successful in biz is all about solving a problem others have or offering something that fills a void.

Don't be Afraid of the Unknown

Something else they spoke about that really hit home was not being afraid of the unknown. Coming from an investment banking background they spoke about their concerns about what would happen if they failed. Would they be employable? What would others think? They said that we've been so trained to be afraid of the unknown and that no matter if you crash and burn or succeed, it will be a learning process which is always useful.

I can 100% relate to this feedback. I've been suchhhh a planner my whole life and starting a biz def wasn't on my radar. Hello, the unknown is scary! But hey, shaking up my plan and moving to NYC from Oregon 6 years ago was pretty scary too, but I did it! And before that? Moving to Portland after college graduation in the dead of the recession just hoping to get my foot in the door in the industry. The truth is, those big scary unknowns? They may be scary and they might not be "in your plan" but they are game changers in directing your life and always come along with a heck of a lot of lessons. 

While it's certainly easy to say don't be afraid of the unknown, isn't it scary not knowing what could have happened if you gave something your all? Personally, I'd rather try and fail, than to have that idea always on my mind wondering what if. Maybe things won't turn out like you'd want, but maybe they will! Let that fear drive you forward instead of hindering you.

I hope you've found some of this advice useful! I had SUCH a great time learning from the BaubleBar ladies and know their words will have a lasting impact. If you'd like to catch the whole session yourself, the XO Group also did a Facebook Live for the event so you can check it out below!